Happy Easter!

"In our hour of deepest sorrow, we can receive profound peace from the words of the angel that first Easter morning: ‘He is not here: for he is risen.'"
~Thomas S. Monson
President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

Tulips.
Thanksgiving Point Tulip Festival. 2007.

Today was a great day! Taught Gospel Doctrine (Sunday School class) all about the miracle of Christ healing the blind man in John Chapter 9 in the New Testament. What a beautiful chapter with so much to glean and learn. And then Easter dinner at Mom's with cousins. So fun. :) I love my family and I love laughing until I cry! (Even if it does hurt.)

In class, we talked a lot about why God allowed Christ to perform miracles then and still, yet today. Often these type of faith-building experiences are not just for our benefit, but for the benefit of those with whom we share. God performs miracles so that we can, with a surety, know that that He exists and then He expects us to share. I felt that way when Amber was in the hospital. I had a distinct impression that this experience was not solely for her learning and growth; on the contrary, actually. It was for us. And the miracle did not occur until all had been done to save her, until her doctors sat across from us and said, "We've done all we can. Now we are just waiting for her miracle." Amber lived and there is no way I will ever be able to deny the hand of God in her healing. There is no doubt in my mind. And I am prepared to share that and defend it, if I need to, for as long as I live.

The blind man, whom Christ healed, as is recorded in John, is questioned several times by the Pharisees and Jews with increasing skepticism: How were thine eyes opened? I believe the blind man was given his sight not just for his sake, not just for the convenience and blessing of seeing, but he was given an experience so miraculous, one that was undeniable, so that he could share the miracle. So that he could simply testify of Christ. He could not deny who healed him and how. "If this man were not of God, he could do nothing," he testified.

He boldly, yet very simply, states that Christ healed him by anointing his eyes with clay and then he could see. Each time he is questioned again he shares the same experience, gradually becoming more bold in his testimony. Would that we all would be so faithful, valiant, and fearless in sharing what we know to be true in our lives.

I believe in miracles. And I believe they occur to benefit us, but also to remind us that God is real. That Christ is His son. That they love us. And that together, they watch over us and are mindful of every little thing (and big thing) in our lives. God lives. Christ lives.

I love Easter. I just keep thinking about all that Easter means and visions of The Passion Play in Oberammergau just keep popping into my mind. What a phenomenal portrayal of the life of Christ and most especially, the week leading up to his crucifixion and his resurrection.

I love Easter. I love the sense of renewal it brings. Tomorrow, I'm going to get some Spring cleaning done. I'm also headed to the Thanksgiving Point Tulip Festival, where I hope to get more tulip pictures like the one above. I'm also extremely excited to be going to the Carl Heinrich Bloch exhibit at the BYU Museum of Art. I'm sure I'll have a whole post about that coming up. Hooray for a day off from work!

Happy Easter, my lovelies.

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Random Thoughts.

"I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself.
For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstance but by our disposition."
~Martha Washington

In case you've missed me, I'll just throw in this picture, yet another from a self-portrait (thanks to the mirror) session.

So let's see...

The past several weeks have been very busy. April is my favorite month and I can't believe I haven't blogged at all. I can't say I'll make up for a month's worth of not posting, but I'll try to put a little something up.

So, can I just toot my own horn for a moment? For the past two months, I've been VERY diligent in my workout routine and I'm pretty excited about that. Consistency is the hardest part right? I made a goal to workout a minimum of 3x/wk and I've been successful. Now that might not seem like much to you who have more discretionary time than I do, but three or four times a week for 45 minutes is a true success in my life. I definitely feel better, but am trying not to get too disappointed that all this focus on exercise and eating better hasn't shown up in decreasing numbers on the scale. I'll keep at it, but routine and consistency are making me feel good. And I know my muscles vs. fat ratio is moving in the right direction and that feels good.

I am contemplating taking up jogging/running. Whenever I walk, I almost always throw a minute (okay, 30 seconds) of jogging in. But I'm just thinking that maybe that wold kickstart some even better fat burning. I love my Curves workout with it's variety and the combined cardio/strength training, but I'm going to start walking again more often now that it should be Spring and a little less chilly outside. So that just has me thinking about gradually introducing running. I think it would be a good stress reliever as well. And heaven knows that I've been looking for a better way to relieve my stress and anxiety.

I've even toyed with signing up for ballet classes again. That would actually be kind of hilarious, considering that I never was very good with the whole flexibility piece. And I haven't slipped on a pair of ballet shoes in over fifteen years. But who's counting? It's never too late.

This week I turned 33. I had a really great week. Dinner with friends at the Bombay House. Yum, I'm drooling just thinking about Chicken Tikka Masala and Lamb Coconut Kurma. Yum. A couple of birthday lunches with friends. A birthDAY dinner with Mom and another birthday dinner and breakfast with friends. I've eaten out a LOT this week--maybe that's why I haven't seen the scale move. :) But all in all, it's been a really nice birthday week, preceding Easter.

I've got lots more thoughts to share and things to catch up on. I still haven't shared about my Grandpa's 90th birthday celebration with my whole family in Las Vegas or my unexpected individual tour behind the Salt Lake Tabernacle organ. And I've got lots more cloud pictures to show you. You know it. :) Be on the edge of your seats.
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A Second Chance.

"Take chances. Take a lot of them.
Because honestly, no matter where you end up, and with whom, it always ends up just the way it should be. Your mistakes make you who you are. You learn and grow with each choice you make.
Everything is worth it. Say how you feel, always. Be you, and be okay with it."
~Unknown

So Blind Date and I had a second chance at that whole kissing thing...
and I'd just like to say, for the record, that:

And I have no problem admitting it. :)

And tomorrow is another chance. And heaven knows I'm going to take it. And maybe even run with it.

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Never turn your back on the ocean.

"May you live all the days of your life."
~Jonathan Swift

Radhanagar Beach, Havelock Island. Photo found here.

I can't sleep.
Sometimes that happens when you accidentally take a late nap.
Or when you can't stop crying.
Although, at times, crying has been the best sleeping pill I've ever taken.
(Actually, I've never taken a sleeping pill. Unless you count NyQuil.)
I know I'm not going to make sense, but I have lots of thoughts right now.

I'm ready for spring.
For tulips and daffodils.
For spring romances.
For nights when it's warm enough to stand on the porch kissing your date.
For warm weather and cool breezes.
I have desperately been missing my foggy shore, recently.
Something inside me longs to see the ocean.
To stand on the cliffs.
To walk through the sand and into the waves.

Never turn your back on the ocean.
Its waves can change without notice.
You wouldn't want to be caught unprepared.
Face your fears and your enemies head on.
Funny how the ocean calms me and yet, it's such a massive beast.

I'm lonely.
If you've ever truly experienced it, you may know that it can be one of the most painful feelings.
It's hollow.
I want to belong.
I want someone to care.
I know, I know. Someone does.
That person is probably even you. You're reading this.
I know.
Thank you.
From the bottom of my heart.
I don't discount you.
But I'm still alone.

There's nothing like having someone be excited for you.
When you accomplish something.
When something fun happens.
Or receiving a genuine compliment.
Instead, it's never about you.
Feeling like your every move, your every gesture, your every choice
is being judged and held against you as proof that you're not really good enough,
all to make another feel better...
There's nothing like that either.

Do you ever feel that certain things in your life are poisonous?
Like they are eating away at you little by little?
They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right?
I hope.
I hope this is character I'm building and not an arsenal with which to fight back and lash out.
Is it supposed to make you weaker before you get strong?
Because at times, I am weak.
Never turn your back on the ocean.
But why do you keep going back?

My face is forward.
I'm patient.
Return criticism with extra love.
I'm sorry for passing judgment instead of extending love.
But sometimes it's easier to just ignore.
Is that wrong?
Is that counter-productive?
Never turn your back on the ocean?
Ever?

Today, I held a baby.
Sweet baby Alayna.
Her chubby cheeks and chubby legs are adorable.
Amazingly, she can do a 360° turn in your lap rather adeptly for someone who can't walk.
She was just what I wanted today.
Just what I needed.
But tonight, knowing that I don't have one like her of my own makes me feel hollow.
Makes me feel lonely.
I'm sad. Jealous, even.
Trying to understand.
But, I'm only 32.
Which means, that feeling is significantly more painful for many.
I'm only 32.
I still have time.

I want to live abroad.
Dreaming of all the different places I could live has consumed my thoughts lately.
Moving.
Somewhere.
Anywhere.
A place of my own.
A new adventure.
A new language maybe.
New surroundings.
A space that is mine.

New York City.
Germany.
London.
San Francisco.
Los Angeles.
Washington, D.C.
San Juan del Sur.
Someday.

Blind Date and I have gone on six dates.
He told me I'm amazing.
He likes me.
That should be great, huh?
I like him.
I'm having fun.
But something is holding me back.
That same something isn't letting me run away.
I don't know why.

Everyone enters our lives for a reason.
I believe that.
Maybe this is for him.
Who knows.
But I kissed him.
He kissed me.
It was pretty simple.
But I'm hoping we'll have a second chance at it.
Because I'm having fun.
Don't ask me what that means.
idk.

Never apologize for showing feeling.
When you do so, you apologize for the truth.
I believe that.
I believe in feeling.
In knowing and exploring my feelings.
That's where life is.
I'll apologize if I've made you uncomfortable.
But I will never apologize for feeling that way.
There is just a better way to express it, if I've hurt you.
But what about when you've hurt me?

Never turn your back on the ocean.
Mrs. Terwilliger taught me that.
I'll never forget that. Or her.
She was a jolly lady.

I might be alone.
But, God knows.
He knows me.
He knows that I'm happy even when I don't seem like it.
He knows that I'm willing.
He knows that I'm trying.
He knows that I've made mistakes.
He also knows all of the good things I've done.
He knows me and He still loves me.
And He is brave enough, strong enough, compassionate enough
to show me that love.
And that's comforting.

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Dangerously Distracted by Clouds.

"Behind every cloud is another cloud."
~Judy Garland

As I've mentioned before I'm totally obsessed with clouds. A dangerous pastime, I know. (Are you singing like Gaston from Disney's Beauty and the Beast? I am.)

The reason this is a dangerous pastime is because I get distracted while driving by the magnificent cloud formations and reflections of light shining on, through, and around them. Plus, I live in one of the most beautiful states with a gorgeous mountainous backdrop for these clouds.

So here are a few pictures for your enjoyment. Just don't judge me for snapping (pictures) and driving. We can have that talk another time.

And these last two are walking pictures... not driving. :) I don't ever want to hear "It's such a beautiful day; not a cloud in sight." That's not my kind of beautiful day. This is.

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Random Photo: Planted Fake Trees.

"You can be sincere and still be stupid."
~Charles F. Kettering

I was out on a walk the other day and remembered to bring my camera so I could get a good picture of the planted fake trees to show you. Remember when I first saw them? I kept looking back thinking, "Surely those aren't fake." Oh, but they are. Seriously, who thought this was a good idea?

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Wishing and Hoping.

Field of Clouds, On and On.
Klaipeda, Lithuania. 2003.
(Photo by me)

Dear eyelashes, wishbones, dandelions, pennies, shooting stars, 11:11, and birthday candles,

Please do your job.

Lovingly and patiently,

me

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It Never Occurred to Me

‎"To those who have given up on love, I say, 'Trust life a little bit.'"
~Maya Angelou

It never occurred to me that I would be 32 and single. It never crossed my mind that I wouldn't be sharing Valentine's Day with a life-long partner.

Grandpa Herm's 90th.

"You don't really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around - and why his parents will always wave back."
~William D. Tammeus quotes

The Birthday Boy

The Birthday Boy's True Colors

I have much to catch up on and I know most of you are expecting a blog post about my graduation, but first, I'm going back to January...

Back in January, my Dad's side of the family got together in Las Vegas to celebrate my Grandpa's 90th birthday. Not only is it amazing that he's 90 (and healthy), but the whole family got together! We were only missing one cousin out of 12. Most of the family stayed in the same hotel, which made it really fun to get up and go to breakfast, not to mention just really easy to hang out with everyone. Unfortunately, we never got a group picture, so I guess we'll have to do it again sometime soon. :)

Happy 90th birthday, Grandpa Herm!

Here are a few pictures to document the celebration and the trip.

Happy 90th, Grandpa!

Marina (w/cousin, Taylor), me (w/cousin, Morgan), the Birthday Boy, Shep, and Dad

ForrestSmithChildren

Aunt Sis, Dad, Uncle Rod, and Grandpa Herm

Just relaxing with two of the cutest girls on this planet (Morgan and Taylor)

Forrest with his children

Viva Las Vegas!

Family dinner before Beatles Love at The Mirage

ForrestSmithChildren at Beatles Love

Beatles Love walkway

Just posing

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A pleasant surprise.

"Expect nothing. Live frugally on surprise."
~Alice Walker

Photo found here.

So tonight I went on a blind date and I think I might have liked it. To be honest, I didn't anticipate it (the date nor the enjoying it part). Pleasant surprises sure are nice every once in awhile.
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Life is Good.

"Even if happiness forgets you a little bit, never completely forget about it."
~Jacques Prévert

Happy Shoes attending Beatles Love. Las Vegas, January 2011.

Don't we all sometimes long for a life different than our own?
A life that may seem more fun, more rewarding, or more glamorous.
Well, I'm guilty of this, at times.
I do love my life, actually. I love the things I'm doing and get to do, but
sometimes I long for other things. Other lives...

You know, the kind where I cook beautifully delicious and healthy meals every day.
The one where I jet-set around the country for work and have the flexibility to tack a few days of "vacation" on to the end of that work trip.

Or the one where I'm running a marathon. Or writing an article for a popular magazine. Some days I dream of having the time and funds to spend a month volunteering on a humanitarian trip to Mexico or working in an orphanage in Romania (or make that Lithuania... then I could speak to them). Or how about six months.

Or sometimes (often) I dream of having a beautifully decorated and quaint home of my own, a home where I could occupy and decorate more than one room. Something I can call my own.

Some days I long for enviable fashion sense and a few extra dollars to bring that into fruition in the form of a fabulous new coat, or blouse, or a rockin' pair of jeans, which of course are rockin' because of my beautifully toned and healthy shape from that marathon I just ran and my amazing metabolism.

Some days I just wish my left Achilles tendon felt normal again (okay, EVERY day I wish my left Achilles tendon felt normal, after having sprained the darn ankle more than 10 times!). Not only do I wish it felt better, but I wish that I could strut my stuff in fabulous heels for longer than three hours without thinking my ankle might just die.

I long for companionship. I dream about a time that I will come home and someone will actually be happy to see me. I dream about having someone to make major life decisions with and not having to do everything on my own. And it would be nice if that someone would rub my neck and shoulders every once in awhile.

Some days, I dream of little babies and visits to the park, and rocking a sweet baby to sleep (because doesn't everyone describe their new infant as "sweet"--have you noticed?) as I'm singing all sorts of lullabies that will just come to my head (because I'm a mom, of course). I dream of making decisions like what kind of double stroller is best (because, let's be honest, by the time I have kids I'll have to have them pretty darn close together to be able to have time to get more than one -- or the three that I think I want). I dream about reading children's books to my children, graduating from board books, to picture books with a story that can be summarized in two minutes as they turn five pages at a time, to true story reading, to the eagerly-awaited chapter books. (My mom had to hide the "chapter" books we read as a family because my brother and I would be so excited to hear what happened next that we'd try to steal a read before Mom got home from work. Of course, I told on him. I was the honest one... or the one who didn't mind being a tattle-tale. Whichever.)

But then I stop and think how wonderful my life is right now. I may not have everything I have ever dreamed of, but there are seasons in all of our lives. And life is the chance to grow my soul. Life is what we make it. And gosh darn it, I've made a pretty good life. :)

I have a great career (despite normal frustrations). I'm well respected in my company and in my field.
I've received, what I consider, an excellent formal education. (I graduate in May. Cue Pomp and Circumstance.)

I've traveled the world. Eleven countries. (I counted. Remember? I'm a list person.) -- And stay tuned for two possible additions this year!

I've discovered the sheer high of choral singing. The kind of high that sends electricity through your body and soul as you sing a sustained chord, which you swear is accompanied by angels (they're called overtones). The kind of music that seems to heal you right then and there. The kind of chords and melodies that open your heart and mind and enlighten you in a way that words cannot describe.

I fluently speak (read, write, think, and dream in) another language. And since Lithuanian is really only spoken by four million people worldwide, I'm one in a (4) million!

I live a life which is most rich. And although, I sometimes I long for things I don't yet have, it's vital for me to remind myself that my life is wonderful. It really is. It is what I've made it. It is what God wants for me. And I am happy. Happy now, not happy when. (I highly suggest reading the "happy when" link. It's a good reminder.) As I said before, there are seasons to our lives, and most everything I long for can still happen... someday. Life is what I make it. And isn't it great?

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It's cooooold out there today.

"Okay, campers, rise and shine, and don't forget your booties 'cause it's cooooold out there today.
That's right, woodchuck-chuckers -- It's...GROUNDHOG DAY!"
~Radio DJ from the film Groundhog Day

Today (well, yesterday, now), each time I went outside (from car to building and building to car, repeat eight times ... gosh it's been a long day...), so yeah, each time I went outside, I literally thought my face was going to freeze and break. Like freeze frozen solid. It hurt. My face hurt. My ears hurt. My eyes watered. And my poor hands couldn't move well for many many minutes after arriving indoors. Bitter, bitter cold. And the wind? The wind was a little unfair today. The whole "feels like -15°F" is a little hard to get used to.

So as you may recall, Groundhog Day is one of my favorite non-holiday holidays. It's a yearly tradition of mine to watch the film Groundhog Day starring Bill Murray. I have to say that movie never tires. At least not if you watch it once a year. My friend Brian came over bearing gifts (movie popcorn) and joined in on the tradition. I think he's been here every year on Groundhog Day since I started this tradition five years ago.

We ended the night with frozen yogurt... in honor of the freezing weather. I got my regular: original tart topped with strawberries, coconut, and a few white chocolate chips. Oh and for fun, I added a dollop of pomegranate/raspberry yogurt. Brian created a new favorite: carbonated black cherry with a little bit of vanilla topped with strawberries, blueberries, and granola.

Love Groundhog Day!
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Discoveries of 2010.

"You learn something every day if you pay attention."
~Ray LeBlond

On the Caribbean Sea.
(Photo from my mom's cruise in January 2011)

Every year my friend Amber has a Girls Night party celebrating the things we have learned and discovered in the past year. (Yes, this is the same Amber who only a few short months ago was in the hospital in a coma. Miracles do happen.) The idea is to come up with a Top Ten list of things you have recently learned or discovered such as: new beauty products, new websites, recipes, stores, books, gadgets, cleaning supplies, etc. We put together lists and print out enough to give one to each guest. And what is a party without some food? No worries. We all make and bring our favorite recipe from the last year. It always ends up that we have the perfect amount of main courses, sides, desserts, bread, etc. The recipe is included on your list, so that everyone gets a copy of it.

This year was special year because we all have learned so much in the last year. Our thoughts shared were rather poignant because they all included major learning experiences from almost losing Amber. I'm so grateful she's still around and that she chose to come back. I haven't written much about the thoughts that have been swirling around in my mind since last October when Amber came home, about what I learned each and every day she was in the hospital and from the overall experience, but I will sometime soon. I've struggled with how to put it all into words. Suffice it to say, I've learned that life is a blessing, God is good, and we are deeply, deeply loved by Him. But more on that later.

For now, here is my list of discoveries from 2010. (And in case you want to look back, here are my previous lists: Discoveries of 2009 and Discoveries of 2008)

Emery’s Discoveries of 2010

1. Roasted Almonds w/Bragg™ Aminos from Whole Foods – I've always loved roasted almonds because it brings out the natural flavor of the nut, but these almonds are a special treat. They are infused with Bragg Liquid Aminos (soy proteins from soybeans, purified water)non hydranate canola oil.
2. Dried Blueberries – I've always enjoyed dried cranberries tossed into a salad, but Costco's Kirkland brand of dried blueberries was a new discovery this year. Tossing a few on a bowl of cheerios (my favorite) adds a healthy kick.
3. Rolo Pretzel Delights – Need an easy treat for any party or activity? These Rolo Pretzel Delights are the answer. Set Rolos on a cookie sheet covered in wax paper. Pop in the oven at 300°F for exactly two minutes. Pull them out and immediately begin pressing a small pretzel on top of each softened Rolo, until the chocolate begins to come through the holes of the pretzel. Let sit on the counter for an hour or speed up the hardening process by placing the cookie sheet in the fridge.
4. The Knife Matters – There is nothing like one of these great big Chinese choppers for chopping vegetables or meat. No kitchen should be without this tool. (Also, if you give this to your husband, he will happily help you in the kitchen. Haaaaa-yah! Just watch out for your fingers.)
5. Finger Puppets – Primary kids love finger puppets. You can also keep a couple in your purse and share them with tired kids at church or your own kids while you are waiting in line, in the car, or at the doctor. Instant theater.
6. Pinterest – Pinterest is a social catalog service. Think of it as a virtual pinboard — a place where you can post collections of things you love, and "follow" collections created by people with great taste. It's a great place to keep ideas for Christmas gifts, or birthday party themes, or wedding ideas organized. Or simply use it to archive all the pretty, fun things you find online. Find my pinboards at www.pinterest.com/eclaires
7. Groupon.com, LivingSocial.com, CityDeals.com – If you haven't checked out these sites and signed up for their daily deals, you are missing you. All deals are at least 50% of the regular price and definitely worth it!
8. Monopoly Deal – Definitely better than the board game, Monopoly Deal is a fast-paced, totally addictive card game that you can play in minutes! Deal and steal your way to success - just collect 3 property sets to win. Sounds easy... but beware the dreaded Debt Collectors and Deal Breakers, which can flip your fortunes in the play of a card! Fast-dealing, card-stealing fun for family and friends! fast-paced, too! Play with as few as two players.
9. “Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing” – One of the greatest of our hymns, which was inexplicably deleted in the 1985 version of our Mormon hymn book, is "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing."  Mack Wilberg's arrangement of this hymn as sung by the combined BYU choirs in 1994 will bring tears to your eyes, and fill your soul with the spirit.
10. Spray Bottles – I detest being hot. I simply cannot function when I am hot and feel overheated. Bring along a spray bottle on any hike, to a parade, to an outdoor picnic to keep cooled off. Such a simple idea that will make a world of difference.

One of my new favorite recipes this year comes from my mother’s cousin, Robin.

Robin’s Yankee Cranberry Cake

This cake is chock full of cranberries and reminds me of a really tasty blueberry muffin, with more fruit than cake. Even if you think you don’t like cranberries, try this. It’s simple and fabulous. The butter sauce really makes the cake.

1/2 teaspoon butter

1/2 cup sugar

1/2 cup milk

1 cup flour

1 ½ teaspoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 ½ cups fresh cranberries (if you double the recipe, you can use a whole (small) bag of fresh cranberries.)

Mix ingredients together and fold in cranberries last. Bake in a 9x9" pan for 1/2 hour at 350 degrees. Cut in squares and serve warm with butter sauce spooned over each piece.

Butter Sauce:

1 cube of butter

1 cup sugar

1/2 cup cream

A dash of vanilla

Melt butter and sugar in a small sauce pan until sugar dissolves in the butter. Add cream and vanilla and heat through.

2010 sure was a great year. Here’s to a happy 2011 with lots of new discoveries!

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Look Not Behind Thee.

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Happy Christmas Eve!

"Even as an adult I find it difficult to sleep on Christmas Eve.
Yuletide excitement is a potent caffeine, no matter your age."
~Carrie Latet

Photo found here.

Happy Christmas Eve! We aren't going to have a white Christmas. I'm kind of sad about that. I like when Mother Nature dumps a ton of snow when I can just stay cozy and snuggled up inside. Oh well. I think some might be coming on Sunday. Fifty percent chance, they say. But really... are they ever right? Remember how a blizzard was coming? And then remember how it never came? Yeah...

I've spent the day sleeping in (until 8:15am), picking up a few last minute gifts before the crowds, getting my car washed (wahoo!), wrapping, and watching Anne of Green Gables (actually, Anne of Avonlea, since I finshed Anne of Green Gables yesterday). I can't believe how much time I have on my hands not worrying about writing any papers. I may even get to read a book or three in the next week or so. :)

When I got home from work yesterday, I was just wiped out, so I took a shower and put my hair back in braids. Maybe it was because of Anne, or maybe it was because I'd gotten used to my hair out of my eyes when I was sick (braids are a must when you're stuck in bed sick), or maybe it's just that I wanted to take advantage of the fact that my hair is getting really long, longer than its been in awhile. Whatever the reason, those braids have stayed with me today, even on my shopping trips. Christmas braids.

Not much of an appetite has returned yet. Still staying alive on chicken broth and saltines, with a few added things here and there. I'm a little nervous to reintroduce foods, since when I did earlier this week my system was definitely not happy with me. Hopefully, I'll be ready to eat some ham tomorrow night because that's what Mom's making. I requested it. Merry Christmas ham to me.

I love you all and hope you are having a pleasant Christmas Eve and that tomorrow will be even more relaxing. Take time to just sit and read, recline, and relax. I will be! And if you're feeling not so merry, try out some of my Operation Christmas Cheer tricks. And if that doesn't work, watch this kid (all the way to the end):

Merry Christmas!

Love,
me
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Operation Christmas Cheer.

"Christmas is for children. But it is for grownups too. Even if it is a headache, a chore, and nightmare, it is a period of necessary defrosting of chill and hide-bound hearts."
~Lenora Mattingly Weber

Photo found here.

So, in an effort to pull out of the depression from being sick and missing out on the fun part of life this week, I initiated Operation Christmas Cheer.

Step One: Finished my last paper of this semester. Finally.

Step Two: I pulled out the beautiful hand-carved nativity which I purchased in Oberammergau a couple of months ago. Really and truly, it may have the best looking carved nativity faces I've ever seen. I'll take a picture soon.

Step Three: I listened to this...

Step Four: And then I watched this...

Step Five: And then I listened to:
this,
and this,
and this,
and finally this.

Step Six: Went to sleep. Everything is always better after a good night's rest... except, apparently, my voice which still sounds like I could sing bass.
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Sick and Tired.

"If you treat a sick child like an adult and a sick adult like a child,
everything usually works out pretty well."
~Ruth Carlisle

Photo found here.

In the last three hours, I have eaten the following:
-ten saltine crackers
-one fruity popsicle (I'm not certain of the flavor--cherry grape?)
-one cup of ginger ale

I'm full. Yes, full.

In the previous 72 hours, I have eaten the following:
-four cups of ginger ale
-one full row of saltine crackers
-half a package of cooked Top Ramen (mostly the broth)
-eight M&Ms

Despite not being able to keep much of anything down for the last few days, I've been thinking about food a lot. Okay, so at first, the thought of food made me nauseated, but yesterday and today, I've wanted to eat more. Let's not talk about how I still can't... but here is proof: I've been pinning all the fun food recipes I've come across. Yummy, huh? (Click on the link. Pinterest is pretty cool.)

But that's all a little depressing. The stomach flu is depressing. My back is killing me, having spent most of the last 72 hours in my bed. Having the stomach flu right after having a week-long cold is certainly not my idea of holiday fun. I missed singing Benjamin Britten's Saint Nicolas cantata in the Christmas concert with the Salt Lake Choral Artists. (That's a first. I've never missed a concert in three years.) That about makes me want to cry. I missed going this morning to the LDS Conference Center to hear the Mormon Tabernacle Choir's Christmas Concert with soloist, David Archuleta, and narrator, Michael York. I still am finishing up papers for one class, which have to be completed by tomorrow. I have not purchased one gift for Christmas. I have not done one Christmas-y thing yet this season. I'm kind of depressed. And lonely. And tired of lying in my bed with my twenty year old mattress that hurts my back. And tired of eating saltines. And tired of not feeling any Christmas spirit. Tired of having to go to work. Tired of having a messy room. Tired of writing papers. Just tired. And I don't even know what day it is. (And yes, I know that I have started four, now five, sentences with the word and, and I'm fine with that.)

So that's about it. Just tired. And sick. The bright side? I have a head start on losing holiday weight and the whole New Year's resolution. Five pounds in one day. Not bad. ;)

Here's to a better Christmas week.

(Confession: I just realized, I have done one thing Christmas-y this year... I watched the First Presidency Christmas Devotional broadcast. That was really nice, despite the fact that the backdrop looked like the blue-tiled Jeopardy board.)
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Random Saturday Night Thoughts.

"What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: Our life is the creation of our mind."
~Hindu Prince Gautama Siddharta

It's getting late and I have a few thoughts, as I am preparing for Sunday.

First, I'm so glad I have my Saturday mornings back. My last Saturday class was today and I drove out of that parking lot feeling free, despite the impending doom of multiple papers.

2. I haven't had much time to think about Christmas. It's soon. Christmas is coming, the geese are getting... FAT. Please put a penny in the... oldman'shat. Hmph. When you run those words together, you get shat. I'm not sure how I feel about that. But I'm going to leave it. After Wednesday when my last paper is due, I believe I will feel a load lifted and will be able to think more about Christmas and maybe even purchase some gifts.

3. Tonight, my roommate did something that previously proved impossible for me... she found my lost watch in the couch cushions! I swear I looked there, but apparently not hard enough. Thanks, Katie!

4. I'm fighting a wannabe cold, but thanks to mass doses of Vitamin B, C, & D, a fair amount of sleep, and my mad soup making skills, I'm holding my own in this fight. I dug around in my vegetable drawer and found a head of cabbage, some carrots, a little bit of celery, onions, and garlic. After chopping and sauteeing the onions and garlic in a little bit of olive oil, I poured in some recently purchased light chicken broth. Then I added some previous cooked/frozen chicken, some pepper, some "poultry seasoning", a touch of allspice, and two bay leaves... and voila, I had some really tasty vegetable drawer soup. Now I just wish I had some kale to add. I LOVE kale in soup. Healthy and beautifully bright green.

5. I babysat last night for our neighbor. I haven't babysat for real in years and I was very excited. Too bad she was asleep when I got there and never woke up. Here's to next time.

6. Tomorrow, I'm teaching Sharing Time in Primary. I'm supposed to be preparing right now. Gotta hurry. Church is at 8am now. Yep, bright and very early! Why, you ask? Oh because some guy decided to burn down one of the Church buildings in our stake back at the end of October. It was deemed unusable for six months, so our Stake Presidency has rearranged the meeting schedules in the remaining two buildings in our stake to accommodate the three displaced wards. So that means we have wards beginning at 8am, 10am, 12pm, and 2pm in our building and we got the lovely, coveted 8am slot. Actually 8am isn't that bad once you're up and there because you get home before noon, and that's always nice. As my mom always says, "The more you accomplish before noon, the better off things tend to go that day."

True true.

Okay, off to prepare my lesson and then GO TO SLEEP!

Oh and since, pictures make reading easier for some... feast on this beauty found here.

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Start Now.

Photo found here.

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Going to bed.

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When sitting down is really standing up.

Fifty-five years ago today, Rosa Parks sat down.

Let us not ever forget that one person can make a difference.

Isn't she beautiful?

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Blue Winter Cottage. I'm lovin' it.

"Oh! the snow, the beautiful snow,
Filling the sky and earth below,
Over the housetops, over the street,
Over the heads of the people you meet.
Dancing,
Flirting,
Skimming along."
~Thomas J. Watson

I absolutely love this. I want to be snowed in. And I want it to be in this house.

Photo found here.

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Kate Middleton and Prince William Make It Official.

"Without love, what are we worth?
Eighty-nine cents! Eighty-nine cents worth of chemicals walking around lonely."
~Hawkeye on M*A*S*H

So I'm just a little bit giddy about this.

Kate Middleton and Prince William
posing at their official engagement announcement in
The State Apartments of the St James Palace on November 16, 2010 in London, England.

I'm so excited about the upcoming royal wedding of Prince William of Wales and Kate Middleton, which may seem silly to you, since I don't even know them personally. It may even seem a bit elementary, or even naïvely dreamy, but it's much more about the pomp and circumstance which will surround this event which piques my interest. It likely stems from the same reason I like people watching (and maybe also something to do with my admiration of performance and being on stage, myself). I enjoy seeing how people choose to present themselves, how they choose to act, what version of themselves they choose to portray to the world.

Maybe it also stems from the fact that, as a three year-old, I am certain that I watched the widely televised wedding of Charles and Diana, as she walked down the aisle with her 25-foot long train. Who could forget that? (I'm sure I watched it again when I was around ten, so maybe that helped the memory, also.)

Or maybe I'm just living vicariously through them? I suppose there is something to be said for this suggestion. I haven't had a wedding of my own, nor ever announced my own engagement, so it's sort of fun to watch someone else doing it all.

Or maybe it's a lure that's genetically inherited. My grandmother, to whom I am often compared, had a real fascination with the royal family, and I guess I just also find their ways and their lives intriguing. I am always drawn to finding out why people do the things they do, and the royal family has undeniable appeal when it comes to determining motivations. Think about it, there are always so many things you begin asking as soon as your start hearing about the royals and the way they do things:  By what title will Kate (or any other new royal) be known? How do they determine places in the line of succession to the throne? When do they use Her Majesty versus Her Royal Highness? The questions abound. (You can find a lot of answers--and squander away heaps of time--at the Royal Family's official website, here.)

But the clincher? The royal family would have nothing short of famously elegant wedding and I do like elegance. I also like wedding dresses. I like a handsome man in a suit (and William is not half bad--the Diana half, that is). I like seeing happy people finding each other and choosing to make a commitment to each other and embrace and own that commitment by telling the world. And... I like sapphires wrapped in diamonds.

William gave Kate his mother's engagement ring.
We haven't seen it in public since Princess Diana and Charles announced their separation.

Wow. Simply beautiful. And totally my style, in case you're wondering.

I've heard also that Kate and William want this want to really be a wedding for the people of Britain. They've vowed to ensure that their families pick up the bill for all the events surrounding the wedding, so it should not cost the citizens anything. Also, they've decided to invite 100 random citizens to the events, as a way to show their interest in including the public. Wouldn't you love to one of the lucky 100 chosen at random to attend? You could see all the glamour up close and rub shoulders with all of the who's who guests. Oh, pick me. I can certainly pull of a wicked British accent for a day. What do you say?

All pictures found at zimbio.

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Blizzard 2010: Total Letdown.

"Wishing is good for us. Daydreams, fantasies, castles in the air, and aspirations all drive us forward, impel us to make things happen. They also tell us a lot about ourselves. Our wishes come straight from our core, and they are loaded with vital info."
~Author Unknown

Sometimes, when I feel bogged down by life, I dream about being snowed in or having a mandatory snow day from life. Seriously, I do. It's kind of like how my brother and I used to "pray" for a little earthquake, when we were little. You know the kind that made buildings topple, rendering it impossible to get to school, but not killing anyone.

Sometimes the (day)dream has me snowed in, in some remote village in Siberia where no one can reach me (although, for my sanity, I DO have internet access) and I live in a little house and can't get out ALL winter (darn). But luckily, at the time I've been snowed in, I have all the projects I've ever wanted to work on (photo albums, mission scrapbooks, writing, quilts, etc.) and all the books I've ever wanted to read, and of course, I have my year's supply of food and other resources, so I want for nothing. Doesn't that sound delightful (maybe, maybe not...)?

So today, I thought my dream was going to come true for at least a day. You know, the "storm of the decade" was supposed to hit with a vengeance today. Businesses all over town were sending people home early and schools were cancelling classes. All in preparation for the blizzard that was going to steadily and heavily drop snow for four hours.

We got TWO INCHES!

I suppose the warnings did do something... it got most of Utah's residents off the roads. But really, does TWO inches of snow merit such a warning?!?! Totally disappointing when you have dreams of being snowed in. Sure it's freezing outside, but we got twice as much snow in 30 minutes on Saturday night! Apparently, there is supposed to be a little more tonight, but who believes them now?!? Haven't they heard of crying wolf?...

Such a letdown.

So my dream of being snowed in hasn't really happened yet, but a girl can still dream right?

And since, I don't really like posts without pictures, here's an entertaining one for your viewing pleasure. (I'll have to upload it later because Blogger seems to be having problems...)

Shep, me and Marina. I'm guessing this was Winter of 1991 or 1992? Help me out, family.

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Preparing for Blizzard 2010.

"At the center of our agency is our freedom to form a healthy attitude toward whatever circumstances we are placed in!"
~Neal A. Maxwell

Today, all the talk was of the impending storm coming from the north. This has been the most talked about storm, and as of this moment, it hasn't even started yet. Well, unless you count the 30-50 mph winds. Work sent us home early. The fewer cars on the road the better, as far as I'm concerned. Especially if my car is counted in the ones not on the road.

I'm preparing for the storm by staying home tonight, clad in my sweats, long underwear, sweatshirt, scarf and a fleece blanket wrapped around my waist. Maybe I'll make some hot chocolate. Unfortunately, I have a lot of homework to get done... so, I'll be busy.

I have plenty of food, as long as the power doesn't go out. I cooked up all that soup that I told you about, but if we have no power, then I don't have a stove or microwave to reheat. I've been hearing that power outages are likely. We'll see.

Next post... I'll let you know if this "storm of the decade" really delivers. :)

Until then, drive safely and stay home out of this blizzard!
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Winter Cooking.

"I eat merely to put food out of my mind."
~N.F. Simpson

Last week, I decided it was time to start making some winter soups to get me through the winter months and save some money while I'm at it. I whipped up some bean soup. Sounds appetizing, right? Eh. Well, actually it did taste good, and beans are supposed to be healthy for you, aren't they? Especially when you've mixed in lentils. I can hear you now, "Lentils? You cooked with lentils?" I know, I know, they taste kind of like pockets of severely compounded sawdust. Well, the soup was pretty good and served to provide me with meals for the last week. I still have three more servings.

I planned to go to the store on Saturday to pick up a couple of extra ingredients to make another soup, Italian sausage soup, but winter decided to arrive that night... I ended up not leaving the house because it was so snowy outside. With no snow on the roads on my way home from work tonight, I stopped at Smith's and picked up the key ingredients I was missing. This soup is similar to Olive Garden's Zuppa Toscana, only without the cream and bacon, so it's healthier. It's pretty delicious, if I say so myself. Plus it has mass amounts of kale, which I find so incredibly delicious in soup.

Here's the recipe:

Italian Sausage Soup

Ingredients
2 lbs of ground Italian sausage (½ mild & ½ spicy hot)
1 tsp dried crushed red pepper
6 slices of bacon diced (cook bacon to a crisp)
1 or 2 large diced onions (white or yellow)
1 1/2 tsp minced garlic (4 cloves of garlic)
6-7 cans of chicken broth (or approx 12 cups water with 6 cubes/teaspoons chicken boullion)
2-3 lbs of russet potatoes - unpeeled and chopped into bite-size pieces
1½ teaspoons salt
¼ tsp black pepper
1 cup of heavy cream (I've actually never used the cream, to reduce calories, and I think the soup is delicious without it)
4 cups of roughly chopped kale (stems removed)

Directions
1. Sauté Italian sausage and crushed red pepper in a large pot. Drain excess fat and set aside while preparing the remaining ingredients
2. In the same pan, sauté bacon till fat is rendered and add onions and garlic for approximately 10 minutes or until the onions are soft.
3. Mix together the chicken bouillon and water, then add it to the onions, bacon and garlic. Cook until boiling.
4. Add potatoes and cook until soft, about half an hour.
5. Add salt and pepper to taste.
6. Add heavy cream (if desired) and cook until thoroughly heated.
7. Stir in the sausage.
8. Add kale just before serving, allowing it to cook for no more than 5 minutes. Delicious!

Then, I have also had a craving for these Chocolate No Bake cookies. Yum. Made a quick batch of those. I'm thinking those won't last all winter...

Well, goodnight. I am headed to bed. I can hardly wait to fall asleep.
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Seriously, Mother Nature?

"Time for the weather report. It's cold out folks. Bonecrushing cold.
The kind of cold which will wrench the spirit out of a young man, or forge it into steel."
~Northern Exposure, Lost and Found, 1992

Seriously?? Did you see that... 3°F on Wednesday morning? And the high is only going to be 18°F? Oh gosh, that just makes me want to grab a blanket and a book and curl up inside with a nice warm mug of hot chocolate and not go to work... too bad I'm not a teacher who has the whole week off...

We already got about six inches of snow last night. It's a real winter wonderland outside, downed power lines, broken trees and all.

Looks like I really need to bundle up and get to bed early so that I don't have any harder time getting out of bed than I already will knowing it's fuh-reezing outside. It seems like just yesterday I was sleeping in my underwear... and now, I practically wear a scarf to bed every night.

And to think, growing up in temperate, beautiful San Francisco, I always wondered and dreamed about what it would be like to live somewhere where they really had four seasons... so dreamy. Hehe.
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