Monday, December 12, 2011

Oh Heaven, help me! I like him.

"It is a risk to love.
What if it doesn't work out?
Ah, but what if it does."

~Peter McWilliams

Photo found here

So I just got off the phone with the latte boy (TLB)*, and I'll be honest (because when am I not? when do I not spill my guts?)... Anyway, I just got off the phone with him and I'm just sitting here wishing I never had to get off the phone. I wish we could just keep talking. Forever. Ugh. Don't let me say such things. Stop me. Now. Before it's too late.

It might already be too late. I like this boy.

Starting about a week or two ago, this phone call thing has sort of become a week-nightly practice. And I'm not complaining. at. all. I'm meeting his family this weekend! I know, right!?! I haven't even thought about when he'll meet mine. He left me flowers a couple weeks ago. I'm a sap and my heart melted a little. He left them just in front of the garage door in front of my spot. I seriously died just a little when the garage door went up and the light revealed my surprise. Nice boy.

I'm afraid to talk about him. I'm afraid to talk about him on here. Why? Because I'm just not sure I can handle another "this one didn't work out" story. My heart is a just little tender sometimes; it's been stomped on and ripped up a few times. I'm just not eager to have that happen again. And when you talk about it, it becomes real. So, I suppose I'm a little hesitant.

Oh, and the fact that it's quite likely that he's found my blog at some point... hyeah, that makes me a little wary to write about him. I'm honest on here. I share on here. Dare I say, I over-share on here, sometimes. What if my words, my true thoughts and feelings about him, scare him off? I guess I should take heart that he hasn't been scared off yet... and it's been 9.5 weeks since our first date. (Not that I'm counting or anything...) And really, let's be honest. I'm not that much different in person than I am on here... so he already knows I talk a lot, I ask lots of questions, I share, I delve deep... and for today at least, he's still around.


*Explanation of what I think will become his blog nickname forthcoming.
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5 comments:

Shauntel said...

Jess and I never lived in the same state (let alone on the same side of the country) until we got married. Those late night phone calls (often into the wee hours of the morning) are some of my favorite memories. All that talking is how we fell in love.

I love that you like him. :)

Stella said...

I'm so happy for you! Being in love is fun. Good luck meeting the fam! They'll love you. :) It was great to see you the other night. Your concert was so fabulous. Merry Christmas!

Bethany said...

Not only did this post make my day, but also Geoff's. And, I agree, nightly phone calls are the best-- like Shauntel, that is how Geoff and I feel in love. There is just something very romantic and pure and honest about just talking. However, the other stuff you can do in person isn't so bad either :).

Becky said...

FUN! I hope I get to hear more about him when we are in Utah...

rawhide said...

that is exciting!!! congrats.