I could use a change... I think.

I am not known for my quick adaptability when it comes to change, especially sudden change; spontaneity has never really been one of my strong suits. So when I anticipated a change to occur yesterday, I mentally prepared myself for it, spending time weighing all the pros and cons, asking lots of thought-provoking questions to help me understand what adjustments would be needed to accept this change, and emotionally gearing myself up. After much thought, I was ready and knew what to expect from myself when this change transpired. In fact, I had thought so much about it, in a sense I was actually looking forward to it!

Then, the moment came … and went. The change I had planned for never took place! All of my emotional and mental preparation had not prepared me for the change NOT to happen. Talk about let-down! Talk about trying to hastily kick my weak spontaneity gene into gear. Why am I not good at this? Life is full of change, even changes to change; you’d think I would have gotten used to it by now! Why had I not prepared myself for everything to remain the same? There are always two sides of a coin. Why hadn’t I truly considered that? Why am I forced to remain in this stagnant situation? I wanted this change. I wanted it badly. At least, I think I did. I wanted it to mean something. I wanted it to catapult me forward. I would have even settled to be on a slow-moving conveyor belt, as long as it meant life was moving in a forward motion.

Alas, back to the drawing board I am, asking questions to help me understand what adjustments are needed to accept this stagnancy. No matter how hard I try, I cannot plan for change of any kind. Change will come to pass when it’s darn good and ready. And change is emotional; it’s hard. But the lack of it can be even harder.

The final waving of his cane.

Gordon B. Hinckley 1910-2008

He'll be greatly missed here, but what a reception he must have had there!

Am I intimidating?

What's Your True Color?

My Result: Black

Your color is black. The color of night. Serene and mysterious, black conjures up images of elegant evening gowns, dashing tuxedos, and gleaming limousines. Traditionally a symbol of success, black also represents power and an uncompromising demand for perfection. Not surprisingly, you tend to set challenging goals for yourself and do whatever it takes to achieve them — your strength of character is second to none. This unfaltering determination, along with your natural elegance, impresses people. But keep in mind that your personality might be intimidating to some. Try to temper your demanding side with a little softness — trust us, it won't kill you. Overall, though, black is the color of professionalism and achievement, which means it's clearly the color for you.

Take this test >

I am...Elinor Dashwood!

'You are Elinor Dashwood of Sense & Sensibility! You are practical, circumspect, and discreet. Though you are tremendously sensible and allow your head to rule, you have a deep, emotional side that few people often see.' ... I'd say that's pretty true.

Take the Quiz here!

Power.

Starburst fruit chews are my favorite candy! Each one is a delightful burst of fruit juice that just melts in your mouth. How can you not love them? When I was in high school, I began calling them "power." Yes, yes, I know. Weird. But seriously, I would have a pack and offer some to my friend saying, "Do you want some power?" :) I can't deny it. I'm just a chewy-fruity kind of girl!

Anxiety comes from stress... or is it the other way around?

anx·i·e·ty /æŋˈzaɪɪti/ [ang-zahy-i-tee] n.
1. distress or uneasiness of mind caused by fear of danger or misfortune: He felt anxiety about the possible loss of his job.
2. Psychiatry. a state of apprehension and psychic tension occurring in some forms of mental disorder.

stress (strěs) n.
1. A mentally or emotionally disruptive or upsetting condition occurring in response to adverse external influences and capable of affecting physical health, usually characterized by increased heart rate, a rise in blood pressure, muscular tension, irritability, and depression.


So, ... I have a mental disorder affecting my physical health. Thanks, Corporate America!

The Golden Gate Bridge.

The Golden Gate Bridge, a recognizable structure to, I'd say, 95% of the world's population, is widely considered to be one of the most beautiful bridges in the world for both its structural design and its aesthetic appeal. Bringing flocks of tourists from all over the world to bask in its beauty, it's easily the most photographed bridge in the world. It was declared one of the modern Wonders of the World by the American Society of Civil Engineers. Construction of this internationally-famous bridge began 75 years ago today.

Painting the Bridge is an ongoing task. Despite its red appearance, the color selected for the Bridge is actually called International Orange. Can you imagine what it would have been like if one of the other two suggested colors was chosen? Steel Gray or Carbon Black. Phew. Someone made a good decision!

Its fog horns, which put me to sleep at night my entire childhood, operate, on average, two and a half hours a day. During March, you'll hear them for less than half an hour a day. However, during the Bay Area's foggy season, which is July through October, they sound over five hours a day.

To some, the Bridge is the most amazing structure ever built. To others, it is a freeway to get to San Francisco from Marin County. To me, it is a little piece of home.

Dentyne-isms.

Have you ever noticed that packs of Dentyne gum have a "Dentyne-ism" list on the back? Here are some funny ones I've seen:

• Dentyne-ism #4 -Why don’t aliens ever kidnap normal people?
• Dentyne-ism #26 - Love is blind, but lingerie is still a good thing.
• Dentyne-ism #92 - Why do people call their advice “two cents” when it’s usually worthless?

Happy New Year!

We were at a New Year's Eve party for mid-singles tonight. Downstairs in the karaoke room, we were waiting for our turn to get up and sing when a guy walked by me, did a double take and turned back to say, "Wow, you've got kicka$$ eyes!" :) I have to say I was pretty happy. That easily beat out a midnight kiss for the best way to start out the new year!